The Meaning in the Murkiness by Noël Turner

The Meaning in the Murkiness

by Noël Turner

“Every good gift and every perfect present comes from heaven; it comes down from God, the Creator of the heavenly lights, who does not change or cause darkness by turning”

(James 1:17, GNT).

I’ve penned songs and stories since childhood. As a little girl, I rewrote the endings of television shows and storybooks. It had nothing to do with the quality of writing. I just loved a happy ending.

Later, I rewrote verses and choruses to the songs on the radio or added new ones to church hymns. Daily routines in our family included drafting tunes and tales for my little ones. I guess I’ve always just had more to say.

About five years ago, I had a small stroke. I recovered but the event frightened me.  A musician by trade, I teach choir and lead music in my community. I sing to communicate.

During the season of recovery, I struggled with pronouncing certain sounds. Between that and a sudden inability to read music as I had for decades, I felt lost. I fumbled for the simplest of words. As my discouragement grew, my daughter made a simple three-word suggestion which relieved irritation and fear while uncapping a well. Write it down.

I decided to stop fumbling for words that tied my tongue and simply write them down instead. The disconnect in my mind remained but the knot of nerves loosened.  The pause gave me time to think about what I wanted to say.

Every good gift is from God.

I still sing. Hallelujah! Writing has become a gateway not only to expressing myself with greater ease, but also to telling others about my God, the author of my story. Out of a murky season, there came a great gift and the opportunity to tell others about the giver.

Oh God, the giver of all good gifts, teach us to find the meaning in the murkiness, to trust in the trial. Remind us something better awaits if we close our mouths and listen. Your ways are always greater. Amen.

Noël Turner lives in Texas with her husband and two young adult children. A music teacher and vocalist by trade, she often draws inspiration from the community in which she serves. She writes of strong, independent women, with a touch of romance. When not working, she can be found lounging around the campsite with a good book and her spoiled pups. n.turner3@me.com  noelturnerstoryandsong.com